For the week of 3/4/04 (I'm going to try to make this a regular thing)
Top 10 People*

1 - John Kerry. I have my reservations; he wasn't my favorite, even when there were only two viable candidates left. But I am fully, totally behind him. You know and I know that things really need to change in this country.

2 - Adrien Tomine. The new Optic Nerve is out, and it's the first in two years. It's part one of a three-part story, and I kinda preferred it when he'd have like three or four stories in one issue, but I really adore everything about Optic Nerve: the artwork, the characters, the dead-on observation of little moments of awkwardness or despair or defensiveness. Tomine is one of the best writers working today, easily.

3 - Seth from The OC. I just really, really like this character. And I like him even better when he's in the background making sharp little comments about the main storyline, the way he was this week.

4 - Cee-Lo Green. I bought Cee-Lo Green is the Soul Machine on Tuesday afternoon, and when I took it home and listened to it it sounded like a total mess, obnoxious future-Prince keyboard washes and squeaky prattling. But then I listened to it on Wednesday morning, and it was great - unforced, gliding melodies with a rough, clanking intensity underlying them. Also, all the best songs are bunched together in the middle (the "Evening News"-"Scrap Metal"-"Glockapella" sequence), and I really like it when albums do that. The record has sounded pretty great since then.

5 - Andre Braugher. Homicide season 4 is out on DVD at the end of the month. More intense glares! More repeated shots of a door slamming! More lines of dialogue with every single syllable emphasized! More of Pembleton tilting his head and sucking his lips! More of the best TV actor, like, ever!

6 - Peja Stojakovic. The Kings are so my favorite basketball team right now. They remind me of those movies where a team of scrappy underdogs comes together because they're mankind's final hope against some unspeakable horror. Except here the horror is either the Spurs or the Lakers; I hate them both. And Peja is totally Bruce Willis in Armageddon. Brad Miller and Bobby Jackson will need to stay healthy, and Chris Webber will need to stop smoking trees for a minute, but I really think Peja might be the dude to end the neverending streak of self-absorbed assholes and incredibly boring robot workhorses winning championships.

7 - Amy Poehler. Now that I'm really thinking about it, she is totally my favorite SNL castmember. That Fallon kid needs to stop appearing in every goddam sketch. Poehler doesn't giggle through her parts; she just looks straight at the camera and says some shit that has you spitting Dorito crumbs.

8 - Lil Jon. He always seemed like a clown in videos, but in the video for Usher's "Yeah" he's a wraith. He slinks through shadows and periodically emerges to flash his fangs at the camera and scream. Dude looks like he might eat Usher. Has anyone ever seen Lil Jon's eyes?

9 - Etan Thomas. The only Washington Wizard worth a damn; it's insane that he isn't a starter. He muscles in, plays hard, and dunks on dudes way bigger than him. I went to college with him, but I never paid any attention to the Syracuse team when I was there, which makes me an idiot. This dude looks and plays like Predator; he's a star.

10 - Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson crazy. Apparently rich crazy people don't really build islands full of deadly robots and dinosaurs and then trap Earth's greatest adventurers on the island to see who survives, as comic books would have us believe. Crazy rich people make slasher movies about Jesus. I haven't seen The Passion yet, but I will.

* This list is going to be all famous people/cultural figures/fictional characters, which is why, like, my girlfriend isn't on it and won't be unless she gets on TV. Sorry Bridget.